Today's Moment of Awkward: The Non-Existent Affair

During my Sophomore year of college I had a writing teacher who was new to teaching.  It was his first year at NYU and we spent most of our classes watching his student films and his single, unimpressive feature.  The rest of the time he spent flirting with several of the female (and possibly a few of the male) students, including myself.  It wasn't really creepy flirting, it was sort of fatherly flirting.  Wow, did I just say fatherly flirting like that's a real thing that isn't creepy?  Okay, scratch that.  Like your older brother's friend flirting with you.  I never had an older brother but I assume it's not too creepy.  It was like "Okay, we both know nothing is going to happen, I'm not really flirting with you, we're just sort of joking around".  That is until he pulled me over after class one day.

Teacher: (In a conspiratorial whisper) I saw you this weekend.  On Mulberry Street.

Me:  (Not getting why we're whispering)  Oh, yeah.  That's where I live.

Teacher:  You were carrying some plastic bags.

Me:  (Still not getting why we're whispering)  They were probably groceries.

Teacher: (Still in a creepy whisper) Yeah.  Groceries.

Imagine someone saying "Yeah.  Groceries." as if it's a code for something dirty.  I can tell you it's not pleasant.

Me:  So why didn't you just say hi?


By this point we were the only people left in the classroom, but he still scanned the room like we were in a spy movie and someone might be watching us.  


Teacher:  I was with my wife.


I suddenly started to get why we were whispering.  Did he think we were having an affair?  Did he think he was having an affair with all his female (and possibly a few male) students?  

Yet somehow I wasn't grossed out by him, I just felt bad for him.  I thought back through all of our classes and realized he'd peaked.  Probably in college.  Maybe showing us his student films and flirting with his students was his only way of reliving his glory days.  Then again, maybe he was just super creepy.  Either way I didn't stick around to find out.


Me:  Hehe, okay, cool, well see you next week.


And thus ended the affair that never started.  It's the closest I've ever come to a Pacey/Ms. Jacobs relationship and I'm okay with that.